Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Macam-macam ada

Colorful characters I've encountered lately...

Scenario 1:

I was at a supermarket check out counter a couple of nights ago, getting some last minute groceries. There was this ancient looking Mat Salleh in front of of me buying a whole cart of gourmet cat food. The first thing that came to my mind was either it must be one hell of a life being his cat or he must be one lonely old soul with only a zillion cats to keep him company (though I must say that this normally applies to "lonely old women" *chuckles!). Anyway, he paid and I was getting ready to be served. Suddenly, out of the blue, this blond haired, tan looking, 40 something Asian woman just cut in front of me. She looked at the Mat Salleh and said, "Honey, this is the one I was looking for lah!" She purred with her fake Ang Mor accent, while brandishing a bottle of DOM in her hand. So, there goes my perception of a "lonely old soul" to one of a "dirty old man." Funny how one can change their perception of another person within seconds, huh? Anyway, this Sarong Party Girl (SPG) continued to hold the line by attempting to open the box and trying to find the price tag (which was so big on top of the box!!!) I hope the Mat Salleh will find the bottle useful, like smashing it and sticking it through her neck! She was so mengada-ngada that I felt like slapping her silly! And her dressing, OMG!!!! You should have seen her dressing!!!! She was wearing those hipster jeans with Rhine stones encrusted onto her flat butt... and her CRACK was showing!!!! It was one disgusting look! After much sighing and eyes rolling from the rest of the people held up on the line with her distasteful public affection, she finally bounced along happily with the Mat Salleh, like some puppy with a new toy. I guess they both deserve each other lah. One dirty old man, and the other gatal leech. Yucks!

Scenario 2:

I was again at the check out counter and there was this women packing her stuff into her shopping cart. The check out counter girl began scanning my groceries and suddenly, this woman exclaimed, "Eh, what is this ah???" She started pointing out at her receipt. I thought to myself, "Shit! Must be another over paying customer. Sure take very long one." But then, it turned out that she was complaining that the receipt was very small and blur! She kicked such a big fuss over it to that 2 check out girls. Come on lah!!! Like it is their fault! They are only working there lah. Besides, it's the same machine that was used by many supermarkets. Anyway, she kept on harping about the receipt while the girls took care of my groceries. While I walked away, I could still hear her complaining that the receipt was too small. What a nit wit! Malaysia, macam-macam ada!

Monday, April 23, 2007

Cabuting


It that time of the year again... I'll be travelling again soon. As much as I'm not looking forward to it, but business must go on. I'm expected to be away every month from now until probably end Oct. Which I will be away as well, with the rest of the family since sis and her circus troupes will be back for 2 weeks from the States. And come Nov., 'll be away again for my short break (Yay!!!). Dec, we'll see first if I can lari for Christmas.
Well, the entire year has been planned. Time to look at 2008 pulak. (Yikes!)

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Thinking aloud

I've always wondered how our human mind develops. Why are some people so great, some are ultra nice and some...hmmmm just plain nasty?

You see, I've met a fairly diverse group of people and I must say that there can really extremes on either end. Some are extremely nice, and some are extremely horrible! Nice ones are great, but once you get a bad apple, it's like being forced to eat a pail of rotten oysters. Yucks!

I've the displeasure to bump into a very ugly and stupid Madam W, whom I've mentioned from my previous post. She kinda reminds me of a certain "fat, ugly, bitch" (FUB) in my residence complex. The sight of her greasy hair, pasty skin and bitter tongue sends shivers to ones spine.

Back to Madam W, I just finished her place yesterday and she must have been the worst client anyone can ever think of in the planet. I've never met anyone as cheap, kiasu and difficult to please as her. She will find every single detail to argue, and then insult you when you try to explain to her on her accusations. To date, she has said that I was blind, useless, lousy, and probably a lot more, except I have learnt to shut her out mentally, after 2 minutes from hearing her voice. To date, she have made my guys return to her house 6 times to fix a perfectly installed curtain rod just because her alarm system will go off when she draws her curtain. How stupid is that? Did she believe me when I said that her alarm system is too sensitive and needed too be tweaked down? No!!!!!! It has to be the curtain rods. I've changed 4 different types of brackets which she has refused to pay for, and changed 4 different rods (where all of them are the same type and refuse to pay for). So, yes, she is arguably, the mother of all bitches. In fact she is SO BAD that I hope her house will burn down. And while she runs out of the burning house, she gets run over by a garbage truck. And after she dies and goes to hell from that accident, she will get run over by more garbage trucks for all eternity.

In fact, lesser grade people like Madam W should be kept in quarantine, in fear of accidental or worse still, planned multiplication (Horror!!!!!) Actually, they should just put them to sleep, once identified. That will make this world a much better place to live in, don't you think? I'd look at it as another way to promote world peace. :-)

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Mountains & valleys... and of course Bala's!

You guys do realised that I've been tormented and tortured by a string of numskulls of late. Funny to think that these people have peas for brains. Actually, I shouldn't be so mean. Perhaps some time back during the days of crop circles and UFOs, these poor creatures were abducted by aliens and had their brains switched with peas (and had their ass prodded, amongst other stuff). Alas, I took SP's offer to head up to Cameron Highlands before I go postal on my staff and loved ones.

I was actually quite excited over the trip since the last trip (actually, my ONLY trip) was when I was 4 years old. The only memory I had on that trip then was the barfing. It happened all the way up, and all the way down. I practically turned my intestines inside out from that trip. Perhaps that was the reason why I never went up again until now.

Anyway, we decided to take the road from Simpang Pulai, which is longer but the ascend was gradual and the road less winding. Least to say, we arrived with no casualties and certainly no intestines hanging out from the mouth. X)

We had made earlier reservations at this place called Bala's Holiday Chalets. Honestly, we took this place because it was within the price range and with such an unassuming name, we didn't have very high expectations. We saw Bala's signpost and turned into a narrow driveway leading up a hill slope. The property was away from the main road. Once we reached it's modest parking lot, we saw the most beautiful turn of the century Tudor styled cottage, complete with a lush English garden, ivy creepers and all the works! One would really thought that they have been transported to Devon shire, England. Imagine the delight that was in stored for us! We couldn't wait to explore the place. The only downside was I forgot to bring my digicam. I kicked myself and am still kicking myself for that. It turned out that Bala's Chalet was built at the turn of the century as a boarding school for the English planter's children who settled in Cameron Highlands. It was then called the Tanglin Boarding School. Mr Bala bought over the property 30 years ago and turned it into a guest house. We had the pleasure of meeting Mr Bala. He was a great guy and recommended several places since we told him that we wanted to hike and do some serious walking. About the property, he said that it was his dream to own this place (he was a local boy) and finally had the chance when the place was put up for sale. He even lives on a section of the main house with his family. His side of the house had the vistas of mountains and of course his glorious garden. I'm so jealous! The place was filled with European nick knacks and it was also one place with the most swings I've ever seen. Every corner has at least one swing. I guess with that kind of weather, everyone will want to be outdoors. We decided to soak in the "Englishness" of the place and ordered afternoon tea at the gardens. A steaming pot of highland tea and freshly baked scones were served with homemade jam and clotted cream. The meal was scrumptious and the garden setting was more that we can ask for. I actually think that Bala's garden is much better than the Ye Olde Smokehouse. We spent the day exploring it's library, sneaked into the other empty bedrooms (they will leave the vacant room doors open to air the rooms), and went up the attic to explore as well. It was truly a marvelous place to be in. The dining room even have a fireplace where Mr Bala will light up every night, indicating that dinner time is ready.

We rose early the next day from the crow of the resident ayams. The crisp air and clear sky was perfect for walking. We went to town for breakfast and decided to do the river trekking first. It was actually very short and we did the entire circle in less than 30 minutes. Upon Mr Bala's recommendation, we drove up to Brinchang to visit the Sungai Palas "BOH" plantation.

Sungai Palas tea plantation is one of the oldest and largest tea plantations in Malaysia. We saw the most spectacular view as we drove along the narrow roads that snaked around the tea bushes. We were quite amazed on how the tea leaf pickers actually reach the tea bushes since most of the plants were planted at almost 45 deg angles. We parked the car at the visitors car park and decided to "bush walk" to the visitor's centre and factory. The visitor's centre is quite new and it actually has a "hanging" terrace where visitors can sit and have tea, while enjoying the breathtaking view of the plantation. Sitting there with a steaming hot cuppa was divine! I felt like I've died and gone to heaven. We then joined the complementary tour of the tea processing plant. It was a pretty simple and and short process, actually. I would have imagined some super high tech machinery, but they were still using the same machines they had since the 1930's! Anyway, the tour was very informative and well planned. We found out that "BOH" is still owned by the same Mat Salleh family who started the plantation. The grand daughter, Caroline Russell is now the CEO of "BOH" Tea Plantations. We spent the rest of the day trekking into the plantation. I don't know how far we walked, but it must have been pretty far since we realised that we have walked for more than 3 hours non stop. The weather was excellent for trekking in Cameron Highlands. How I wish KL's weather was a little closer to this.

Anyway, the 2 days passed by quickly and like the saying, "all good things will come to an end," we found ourselves packing up the car and ready to leave this little paradise. Well, at least I know for sure that it won't take me another 20 years before I decide to visit Bala's and Sungai Palas again!

Monday, April 09, 2007

3pm on Good Friday

A highly dramatised segment of 2 hours of my life.
Warning: Long blog ahead. Read at your own perils.

She looked up again onto the long, naked glass window. Her beady eye's squinted and focused directly on top of the window frame, where the curtain brackets were fastened. Beads of sweat accumulated as they collided into each other on her folds of skin before dripping down on to the polished ash granite flooring with a silent splosh. Her eye's darted back and forth from one end of the window to the other, like an eagle looking for a prey.

Madam W is typical middle aged Straits Chinese women. She lives in a spacious semi-detached house, furnished according to her Feng Shui master's recommendation. Her some what opulent lifestyle was attributed mainly from her husband's rank and file success as a contractor. She was educated briefly at a primary Chinese medium school, before marrying the man of her family's choice at an early age. Naturally, her life was devoted to her husband, children and of course her home. Her home... it is the only world she knew apart from the fragmented stories she hears from her children and husband's conversation about the outside world. Of course, the other highly anticipated, but often sensationalised resource Madam W relies upon is the daily gossips she receives across the fence while putting out the laundry every morning. Her home was everything, and she was the boss. And she know it.

"How can this be?" Madam W hissed under her breath.

The brackets jutted out from the walls, sans track that was supposed to follow along it, like a miniature train track. But it's missing.

"How can they not fix the curtain track? I don't think I've been unreasonable to them. After all I've only requested them to change it 3 times." She thought to herself.

"Anyway, they must have made so much money out of me, I must make this worth while." Madam Wong's mind was reeling like a motion picture, thinking back on how she rejected almost every piece of curtain tracks just because it was not what she saw in Ikea.

She instinctively picked up her cellphone and began punching in the familiar number with her thick stubby fingers. She knew that number well. After all, it was one number she has dialed a thousand times for the past one week. The phone line connected with a dull beep and went until a familiar recording spoken in English, indicating the voice message. Madam Wong didn't know a single word of English but she knew it was the voice message system. A similar one that she has subscribed in Chinese.

"Damn! Why is he not picking up my call?" She muttered to herself.

She continued her dialing efforts while mumbling to herself.

The traffic on Jalan Kinabalu was peaking at it's worst at 1.30pm. Cars were inching bumper to bumper as the compulsory Friday prayer was about to begin. Cars were parked haphazardly along the curb and throngs of Muslim men were seen walking towards the National Mosque for their weekly absolution.

This has not been the best week for me as I jogged my memory on the recent events from work. Motorbikes were zig-zaging in between the lanes and I immediately erased that thought from my mind as I needed to focus on getting to St John's on time. I managed to squeeze in between a red Kancil and tourist bus at the back of me before exiting out towards Jalan Sultan Abdul Samad. All this while, the cell phone was buzzing quietly on the back seat like a fly on a hot pavement as it was on silent mode.

"Finally!" I sighed in relief as the traffic moved seamlessly all the way to the foot of Bukit Nenas. As the car climbed the hill, St Johns came into view with it's familiar twin bell towers rose from either side of the main entrance. The cathedral was at it's magnificent best on Good Friday since the exterior has been freshly painted, thanks to the generous donations from a rich patron. The building oozes authority with it's ornate art deco style, a typical design during the early 60's. The weather was extremely hot and arid. At 1.45pm, the sun shone directly above the cathedral's roof. The Indian terracotta roof tiles sucked on the heat greedily, like a baby nursing on a mother's breast and baked the interior.

Inside the church, most of the seats were already taken by 1pm, even though Good Friday service was only starting at 3pm. I walked towards the West wing entrance and scanned for J, since he was saving a seat for me. It didn't take long for me to spot him and sat myself down among the rest of the parishioners.

The service began promptly at 3pm, as I was about to doze off in the middle of the stiff ling heat. The fans were steadily blowing hot air around and being in a jam packed church on a Friday afternoon wasn't helping at all. I rose from my seat as the entrance hymn began. The service was followed by the Passion of the Cross and later by the sermon. By the time the sermon was being delivered, my mind was already struggling to keep focus as the heat steadily scrambled my brains and drained my body. The priest was belting out the Gospel according to Luke but my mind reduced the entire scripture to a monotonous drone. It was truly God's test. The fatigue, the heat, sweat building up in between the atmosphere of skin and cotton, the silent buzz of the cellphone in the pocket. It was all God's test. I pinched myself awake and kept at it. The phone was still buzzing the entire time. How annoying! I hope it is not an emergency at home or at the office. I prayed to the Lord for patience. Yet, the phone kept on buzzing. I finally relented and fished out the phone from my pocket. The number indicated a Madam W. Annoyed, I switched it off.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Thinking aloud

This week has not been a good week and everything that can go wrong, HAS gone wrong. I'm currently a proud owner of a flooded basement carpark, met the mother of all monster customers and had encountered a string of misfortune which I will not bother to bore anyone with. It is times like this that I really feel like throwing the towel and calling it quits. Yes, I am that vulnerable! Memories of the glorious past began to flood out from the deep archives of my long term memory. How I longed for those carefree days in college.

Yesterday, I called my ex again in the States. I must say that I've been calling her a lot lately. Talking to her was a great help and perhaps I needed that dosage of Western mentality that is straight forward with no hidden agenda. I'm just so tired of this mind twisting haggling that goes absolutely no where that Asians love. It's just full of bullcrap!!! I guess I just can't fit no matter how hard I try. Now I know how a jigsaw puzzle might feel like if it was jammed into a slot that doesn't fit. Not that a jigsaw puzzle can feel, but you know what I mean. My ex said that I needed to head back West. Perhaps she is right.

Jeremy emailed and announced that it has been 3 years as of Feb since he'd moved to London. He's fitting in fine and still misses LA a lot. I can imagine. After all, he did live there for 9 years after we graduated. Makes me always wonder where I would have ended up if I went against mom's word and stayed back in the States. Sigh.... no point thinking about it anymore because it's too late.

I need a break. The mind is clouded with my past and current problems. I don't think it's a good mix. SP called and asked me to follow her to Cameron Highlands. I think I'll take up the offer.